Tomorrow I am starting the 30+ hour trek back to Washington State.
Going home.
I've been in Liberia for a year straight this time. Some people would ask "What's the big deal about a year?" But anyone who has lived in Liberia will understand-- I kinda feel like I am going insane. I love Liberia, and am coming back, but it is time for break.
It is always a strange feeling to leave a place that I have spent so much time, a place that has become home in it's own way-- to go home.
In years past I have fought against leaving Liberia to return to the states. This time, I am VERY ready. But, I am not without mixed feelings. It is difficult to leave people and places-- a way of life-- that has become so familiar. In a way, I am heading into a great unknown.
As much as we may try, I don't know what people back home have been through in the last year and they don't know about me. As my life has been going full force here, so has everyone's back home. I have found with some people it is easy to pick right back up, while with others it is more difficult each time I return. I find myself feeling very insecure about where or how I will fit back in to people's lives.
It is an awkward feeling to be sitting in a room of people I've known well, for years, and not know the inside jokes, the hurts and the celebrations of the last year. To not get the pop-culture references or be the only one at the table without an iphone. I've learned all this from past experiences, but I've also learned something else... it's worth it.
To reconnect with loved ones, to hear stories of pain, sorrows, frustrations, joys, happy-times, mediocre times. To be able to laugh, hug, cry, talk, whisper, walk, together over coffee, in a familiar living room, at the mall, on the trail, in a car.
This year there have been some horrible things that happened while I was gone, like the death of one of my closest friends, my dear Michelle. I don't know what life on that side is like without her. People have been hospitalized, become engaged, travelled to other parts of the world. I want to hear all the stories.
And so, as I pack up my Liberian life in a neat little package to carry back with me, I hope those of you I know on the other side of the Atlantic will want to hear my stories too. Let's be patient with each other, listen and learn from each other. We might not know or understand everything that has gone on in the last year of our lives, but we know and love each other. I think that alone, being in the presence of someone who loves you, who wants to know you more-- that is going home.
Going home.
I've been in Liberia for a year straight this time. Some people would ask "What's the big deal about a year?" But anyone who has lived in Liberia will understand-- I kinda feel like I am going insane. I love Liberia, and am coming back, but it is time for break.
It is always a strange feeling to leave a place that I have spent so much time, a place that has become home in it's own way-- to go home.
In years past I have fought against leaving Liberia to return to the states. This time, I am VERY ready. But, I am not without mixed feelings. It is difficult to leave people and places-- a way of life-- that has become so familiar. In a way, I am heading into a great unknown.
As much as we may try, I don't know what people back home have been through in the last year and they don't know about me. As my life has been going full force here, so has everyone's back home. I have found with some people it is easy to pick right back up, while with others it is more difficult each time I return. I find myself feeling very insecure about where or how I will fit back in to people's lives.
It is an awkward feeling to be sitting in a room of people I've known well, for years, and not know the inside jokes, the hurts and the celebrations of the last year. To not get the pop-culture references or be the only one at the table without an iphone. I've learned all this from past experiences, but I've also learned something else... it's worth it.
To reconnect with loved ones, to hear stories of pain, sorrows, frustrations, joys, happy-times, mediocre times. To be able to laugh, hug, cry, talk, whisper, walk, together over coffee, in a familiar living room, at the mall, on the trail, in a car.
This year there have been some horrible things that happened while I was gone, like the death of one of my closest friends, my dear Michelle. I don't know what life on that side is like without her. People have been hospitalized, become engaged, travelled to other parts of the world. I want to hear all the stories.
And so, as I pack up my Liberian life in a neat little package to carry back with me, I hope those of you I know on the other side of the Atlantic will want to hear my stories too. Let's be patient with each other, listen and learn from each other. We might not know or understand everything that has gone on in the last year of our lives, but we know and love each other. I think that alone, being in the presence of someone who loves you, who wants to know you more-- that is going home.
